Boy Window Chapter 22: Grievous Bodily Harm

Last time in Boy Window...Amber is pregnant. Jake invited DBD to hopefully duke it out. In my mind, the BFG 9000 is involved.

Chapter 22

“~Liam~”

Liam says how he has to keep Jake in check.

“Sure, I wanted to kill that asshole as much as he did, but we seriously needed to be careful. If we literally jumped him as soon as he walked in, we'd be liable...”

Kirsty, that's not how that works. A man with a history of violence threatens the well being of 7 people, 3 of whom are minors and 1 which is an infant, you don't need Matt Murdock or Jennifer Walters in your corner to argue that you felt threatened. Especially, when dialogue from the previous chapter led us to believe that DBD is currently wasted. Hell, you could do the logical thing and call the cops. You could explain that Ruby was being abused, that you were helping escape that situation and DBD is trying to retaliate. You have 6 people (not including the baby) who can testify to his criminal behavior, not to mention the piles of medical records from injuries that they have suffered at DBD's hands over the years.

Anyway...

Liam takes Amber next door after arguing about how stupid their plan is. Mind you, she isn't saying it's stupid because there are a hundred better options. She is saying it stupid because they could get in trouble. He wins the argument by carrying her to his place. Because this is a romance and the guy has to carry the girl at some point. But before we move on I want to point out this line.

“She wasn't staying here near that man, no way, because if he even looked at her the wrong way, I wouldn't be able to restrain myself...”

So it's not for her safety but because you would kick his ass and possibly get in trouble.

He makes her promise to stay. Tears are involved but I'm listening to a Latin tribute to Michael Jackson so all I wanna say is I really don't care about this. (5 points to those who get the joke)

“'If you get sent to jail for murder, then I'll wait for you'”

This would be sweet if this wasn't entirely preventable.

Liam returns to Jake's side. They repeat the idea that DBD has to throw the first punch.

“'I just want to talk to him and tell him to get the fuck out of our lives...'”

And you couldn't have said this over the phone why?

DBD shows up. Jake is out for blood like a starved pig (those guys are terrifying).

DBD: “Liam James, you've grown a bit, huh?”

Liam: “Stephen Walker, you stopped molesting young girls?”

...I didn't take anything out (except DBD sneering) and I have reread that section about five times and I still don't get this exchange.

DBD says he is taking his wife and son back plus Amber, a threat that would have no weight if they got a restraining order or put him in jail like any sane person.

“Maybe his plan was to let his dad get a couple of hits in first so he could say it was self-defence.”

Is that how it works in the UK? No matter how much someone abuses you over the course a life time, if they aren't presently beating the shit out of you, you can't do anything about? Is that why they haven't called the police? I think stand your ground laws are abused to high hell, but DBD has a history of violence and is angry. Jake could easy argue that he felt threatened.

Anyway...

DBD says he should have injured Jake's mom while she was pregnant with him and force her to miscarry. Jake shoves him. Liam tries to calm him down. Amber shows up because she is an idiot. DBD grabs her, when she struggles, he back hands her into a table. Liam precedes to beat the crap out of him. Jake has to pull him off DBD because

Jake: “LIAM, AMBER'S HURT!”

Amber: “It hurts, Liam. Please, it hurts so much.”

Liam: “What hurts?”

Amber: “My stomach.”

“~Amber~”

We rewind to just before DBD shows up and Amber convinces herself that she needs to witness the crime for legal purposes. The same things happen but from Amber's perspective. When we finally get back to where we left off before, and Liam is trying to comfort Amber.

“How the hell is he still comforting me? This is all my fault – why is he not shouting at me?”

Anytime someone does something that makes sense, I wonder if the characters are annoyed and confused. What Liam, you are being loving and caring while I am obviously miscarrying?

Then Amber surprises me by acting realistically. She is ashamed, embarrassed, and terrified because she is miscarrying. She is also paranoid that Liam is going to leave her because she is miscarrying, but sense isn't usually a thing when you are panicking and in pain.

What does bother me about this whole thing is that we are on page 244 and she found out she is pregnant on page 228. Not including the 4 pages of repeated events, we have only known about the baby for 12 pages. That is not long enough to form an emotional attachment. Why was she pregnant at all? Just so Liam has an excuse to to hulk out and beat the shit out of DBD? DBD would have still hit her, and Liam would have still reacted. What was the point? It didn't progress the characters or the story.

Liam tries to beat DBD up some more. Jake pulls him off. Everyone finds out that Amber is pregnant. DBD calls her a slut. Liam sees red, but the sounds of sirens keeps him from doing anything. Paramedics show up (for the second time in a few days).

At the hospital, the doctor explains that they need to perform a surgery to remove the miscarried fetus. All this tells me is that Moseley is capable of doing research but has refused to do so until now. Amber goes into surgery.

“~Liam~”

Jake shows up.

“I was actually surprised that he wasn't kicking the crap out of me for getting his little sister pregnant...”

He probably has other things on his mind, and we all know that he wouldn't anyway. That would count as consequences for your actions.

Amber gets out of surgery. All went well. Eventually she wakes up and is surprised he stayed.

“She honestly thought I would leave her?”

Well, you both are terrible people so I'm not surprised by any of this.

At night, Liam uses his puppy dog face on a nurse to get her to let him stay the night. They fall asleep on her hospital bed. Mind you, this isn't an end-of-Titanic-they-totally-could-have-both-fit situation. Hospital beds are small, I have no idea how this worked out.

In the morning

“'Liam James, I'm arresting you on suspicion of Grievous Bodily Harm.'”

The dad is suing for GBH? Are you serious? There is no way this would stick. DBD hit his underage daughter so hard that she miscarried Liam's child. Unless extreme emotional distress is not a viable defense in the UK, this shouldn't be a problem. And when the police find out why DBD was there in the first place, his history of abuse will be known. Which leads me to the question. WHY WOULD DBD SUE WHEN IT WOULD FORCE POLICE INVOLVEMENT AND POSSIBLY RESULT IN HIS ARREST? Hell, Amber could have him arrested for GBH because HE HIT HER SO HARD SHE MISCARRIED!

Whatever...

The officer reads Liam his Miranda Warning (the UK version at least), it confuses me when he says

“'You have the right to an attorney.'”

Because I was under the impression that they were called “solicitors” in England. Either way the chapter is over and I am free!

Boy Window Chapter 21: I'm Surrounded By Idiots

Last time in Boy Window...the boys were sneaking around and Amber was too stupid to realize something was up. She finds out DBD is beating Johnny and his mom, and she is pissed that Johnny didn't tell her. She passed out.

Chapter 21

“I was vaguely aware of an annoying beeping noise...”

The sound of your own voice?

“I finally opened my eyes to see [Liam] leaning over me, looking gorgeous as always...”

I'm glad that, with her head hurting and in a strange environment, she still has the ability to say “damn my boyfriend is fine”. That is super important.

We find out that Amber is in an ambulance because she hit her head when she randomly passed out. They arrive at the hospital and the ambulance wants to take her in on a gurney. Amber protests but the EMT says

“'Sorry, sweetie, it's standard practice. You arrive with lights, you go in a bed,' she countered, winking at me.”

Why is the EMT winking at her? What is this wink supposed to symbolize or communicate? Why can't these characters do anything that makes sense?

Liam tells her not to do that again, and for some reason, this makes Amber laugh. Amber says she had no control over it. They smooch and the doctor walks in.

“'Oops, sorry. Shall I come back later?' the doctor asked, grinning.”

Ew. Just ew. I doubt a doctor would be so casual about someone who was brought in by ambulance because she spontaneously passed out.

The doctor asks the usual questions but Amber takes offense to him asking about drugs.

“Do I look like a freaking drug addict?”

And what do drug addicts look like Amber?

The doctor asked what she has eaten. She realizes she only had toast that morning. The doctor says that's probably it. Personally, I doubt this but I frequently forget to eat, and when I was especially poor, would go without eating for a day and a half before feeling like I might pass out. But maybe Amber is more delicate or hypoglycemic. Not like we would've learned about this earlier or something.

The doctor asks her about stress. She says she is stressed and in her head lists the reasons why. Funny, if she didn't list them I wouldn't have known that she is stressed. Everything still has a calm tone to it.

“'I'm going to run some bloods to make sure...'”

Is this a thing that doctors say? Cause when you say “some bloods” I don't think of tests.

Just no...

The doctor takes Amber's blood for the tests but, oh noes, she hates needles. So how to they handle this? Liam makes out with her while the blood is being drawn. HOW WOULD THAT WORK OUT? But I guess I'm supposed to accept that Liam can kiss Amber and that not be in the way of the doctor drawing her blood.

We find out that Amber's entourage is in the waiting room. Liam gives them the update and brings back a sandwich. The nurse comes in to do Amber's stitches. She must had hit her head pretty hard because she needs 6.

Page break and the doctor comes back with the test results.

“'You're pregnant'”

I think it is tonally appropriate that pandora started playing Alex Parks cover of Mad World when I entered this section. Just saying.

“I burst out laughing. Damn, that was funny, he almost had me there.”

Amber is the dumbest person I've ever read that an author has insisted is smart. Doctors don't joke about things like this.

We find out that Amber didn't read any of the material about the birth control she was given, so while she was taking it as prescribed she didn't start it as prescribed so she is actually about a month into her first trimester.

“'Liam?' I whispered. He was honestly scare me a little, I'd never seen anyone be so still in my life – it wasn't natural.”

How sad is it that I hope he will be an asshole and jump out the nearest window? You know, so they would have consequences for their actions. He doesn't.

The doctor does an ultrasound. I don't know if he can considering how early into the pregnancy she is, but I've never been pregnant so I would not know.

“I didn't want to see because then I wouldn't be able to do what needed to be done.”

Wow, does this mean what I think it means?

“I couldn't have a baby, we were too young. It would ruin everything.”

Valid points. You don't have the means or desire to have a child and I can't believe this book is going in this direction. It's refreshing because I didn't expect it. Usually, these books are aggressive with their pro-life message.

“'An abortion? What? Why?' [Liam] cried, shocked.”

Of course we weren't going to have something new and different.

They have a conversation were Amber is surprisingly sane and explains why they can't have a baby. Liam says that he loves her and guilts her into keeping the kid. This actually reminds me of the back story to a character in another book.

The author is sweet and the title is a backstreet boys reference, what more do you need?

The main love interest (Ty) guilts his career driven girlfriend into having their son and she left him for it. I liked that the story painted what Ty did as a douche bag thing to do, because it is. Just like it would be a douche bag thing to do if he tried to talk her into an abortion.

Better books aside...

Amber decides that a baby is a perfect idea, because they will have help from their parents, and even though Liam will be at college on a hockey scholarship (meaning he would have to play) and that will take up all of his time, and Amber has an abusive father that they refuse to put in jail, but hey the kid “wouldn't be short on love” and you know what The Beatles say “All you need is love”

And, of course, make outs happen in the ER because this is a Grey's Anatomy type hospital were people are conveniently not around when sexy times are happening.

They get home. Jake wants to know whats going on. They lie. Guys, I think Jake will notice eventually. Even if Amber never “shows” when she comes home in 8 months with a baby he will guess.

“I just hoped that Jake didn't go too crazy when he found out and that he didn't beat the crap out of Liam for impregnating his little sister.”

The way they built up Jake beating up Liam last time, I'm not falling for it this time.

Liam tells the resident adult that he will be spending the night, which would not fly with any of the adults I know, but whatever. They go to bed. Amber decides to sleep naked. The only reason for this inclusion is so Liam can say that he will still love her when she is heavy with child.

Another pagebreak and some super boring narration before Jake answers his phone.

“'What the hell do you want? […] Are you fucking drunk? […] Yeah, so what? What are you gonna do about it, old man? […] We don't want to see you, so fuck off. No. She doesn't want to see you. I swear, if you come near her again, I'll kill you. […] Actually, you know what, screw it, come over, come over right now. We're home, come on over and let's talk about it.'”

Yeah, Jake. Invite the abusive asshole over to where you are hiding the daughter he raped every week for 8 years and the woman he is beating regularly. That sounds like a great idea. But that's ok, because Jake tells Amber to go next door to Liam's house. DBD will never look for her there.

“'He knows that I helped [Ruby]; a neighbour saw my car in the drive.”

How would DBD know what car you drive? He left before you had a car. Whatever. I just want this to be over.

Amber: “Please don't, you'll get in trouble. Please?”

Jake: “Not if he starts something first”

I don't think that's how it works. Jake is inviting DBD over knowing that a fight will happen and wants to use that as an excuse to beat the shit out of him. Some how “he started it” doesn't seem like a viable defense. The good news is that the chapter is over!

Boy Window Chapter 20: Blissfully Short

Last time in Boy Window... DBD was doing the creep, and we find out that he is beating his new family (to no one's surprise). Jake, Liam, and Johnny make a plan to liberate Johnny's family without telling Amber. Jake cries in Liam's arms and slash fic is demanded.

Chapter 20

We are back in Amber's POV and it is a week later. The guys are being suspicious and sneaky.

“They were always off talking in hushed whispers, and would stop whenever I went near them.”

Amber mildly suspects they are talking about her

“I didn't want to talk about that man ever again, so if they were to talk about me and leave me out of it, then good.”

What? What does talking about Amber have to do with talking about DBD? It makes sense for her insecurities to make her thinking they are talking about her, and it makes even more sense that she assumes that they are talking about what happened to her, but nothing in the paragraphs references DBD. The phrase “that man” is the only indication that DBD still narratively exists. It just sounds odd.

It's friday morning, Liam is getting out of bed first. They banter. Liam says he has things to do, but in the most “I'm obviously lying” way since Jan Brady.

Naturally, Amber jumps to

“He's cheating on me...”

You know what would have made this tense, interesting, and make me worry about the state of their relationship? If we didn't get Liam's side of the conversation in the last chapter. Moseley spent so much of the first half of this book asserting how little faith Amber has in Liam. At the time, it seemed dumb because he is stupidly smitten with Amber (for no reason). By not giving away in the last chapter that is all a secret plan to save Johnny's family, there would have been some stakes. There would have been some pay off for all that “will he break my heart” business. It would cement the idea in Amber's and the audiences mind that Liam is not shitty by play with our expectations. But I guess we are not allowed to think poorly of Liam (since his earlier manic sexually aggressive behavior is supposed to be excusable), not even for a few chapters.

And literally, a paragraph and a sentence later

“I trusted him. I was sure that he wouldn't cheat on me – that had just been a stupid spur of the moment thought.”

This sentence is either Amber lying to herself, or Moseley dismissing logic again, or the writing is just bad. What is Amber's motivation and reasons as a character for thinking that Liam might be cheating? Because there has to be a reason for it. Strong characters are built on motivation. You know when an actor or director asks “What's my motivation?” that is a serious question. So why write that sentence and then this one, if Amber doesn't actually think that Liam is cheating? What purpose does this serve?

Smooches and sweet nothings happen, then Liam leaves. Amber finds out that Jake is all

Amber believes him and a random idiot takes her to school. As it turns out, Johnny is mysteriously sick too. Again, this would actually be surprising and curious if we didn't know they were planning something.

“School passed unbelievably slowly because I didn't have seeing Liam at lunchtime to look forward to.”

It's going to suck for them when they get jobs. Or when Liam goes to college. Or if/when Liam becomes a pro-hockey player and has away games.

“My stomach felt queasy, and I couldn't even force anything down for lunch.

Great, now I'm getting sick!”

Either this is some placebo thing or I'm going to get very angry very soon.

Kate takes Amber home and while there she runs into the boys, Ruby and the baby.

“What the heck are they doing here? Wait, I thought Kate said Johnny was sick. He doesn't look sick.”

Why is Amber the dumbest person around? Why is she the main character and not a box of dull pencils? They would be more interesting.

They tell Amber that DBD is up to old tricks and her first response is

“He'd been getting abused and he didn't tell me? I could feel myself getting angry with him.”

Says the girl who didn't want to tell him about her own abuse even though there was the strong possibility that DBD was beating him.

Amber stops herself from yelling at him when she sees that he is distraught. I'm still pissed because she is hypocritical and not wanting to kick someone when their down doesn't make you a good person (it only makes you not a bad one). Instead, she hugs him and says

“'You could have talked to me'”

Way to rock the guilt trip Amber.

Amber finds out what we already know, that they have been planning the escape all week. Everyone says that Amber doesn't look well and the chapter ends with

“Damn, I'm so hot! My lips and fingers were tingling and I started to feel a little dizzy.”

And I think she passed out. Honestly, I don't know because it just ends there.

Boy Window Chapter 19: So Many Pages, So Little Sense

Last time in Boy Window...Amber admits she is useless and she runs into her dad at Johnny's house. There was also a lot of horny teen grossness, but the less I think about that the less I want to drink.

Chapter 19

“'Amber?' the lady repeated, looking between him and me. 'Your daughter, Amber?'”

Nah, some other teenager named Amber that your husband is undressing with his eyes.

Johnny's mom (Ruby) says how she feels like she knows Amber.

“'You too, Ruby'”

This is a “me problem” but I always feel weird addressing someone who is some years older than me in a casual setting by their given name. It always feels uncomfortable, especially when I don't know them.

Amber narrates about how she wants to run from the room. She says some of the right words but it doesn't resonate with me at all. It would have been nice to have some of this earlier to balance out all those times that PTSD meant plot convenience. As it stands, this feels like a late in the game attempt at character development and rising action. We only have 6 chapters (including this one) and an epilogue left and this is the first time the author has endeavored to give us a plot.

Anyway...

Ruby invites Amber to diner.

“She seemed really nice, too nice for this abusive asshole.”

If only there were someone or some people to tell her how much of an abusive asshole he is.

Ruby reiterates her offer and Douche Bag Dad (DBD) does this

“He nodded, his gaze travelling the length of my body, making me go cold.”

How does Ruby not notice him making rapey faces at Amber?

Ruby crosses the room to get medicine for the sick baby. Apparently that space of the kitchen is in a vacuum because she doesn't hear or see the following exchange.

“My father walked a couple of steps towards me and I shrank back against the door, my breathing coming out in shallow gasps. I thumbed my phone awkwardly and tried to dial Johnny – he was the closest person.”

Yes, Johnny is the closest person. Not the woman standing 3 feet to your left. Johnny who is upstairs getting dressed.

“'How have you been, Amber? I've been trying to see you for years but your brother wouldn't let me'”

What kind of sense does that make? Because they haven't filed charges, DBD has a legal right to see his daughter. If he really wanted to see her, he could and Jake wouldn't be able to do anything unless Amber or her mother (on Amber's behalf) filed charges against him. I get him not wanting to go to prison for raping and abusing Amber for 8 years but I don't get why he says it was Jake keeping him away. That would be like not stealing from a certain store because you know a certain asshole works there. It has nothing to do with the legality of the act or even the fear of getting caught, you just don't want to possibly see that one asshole.

Amber describes DBD's mention of Jake as a sneer. Again, I have to wonder how Ruby does not notice any of this.

“I looked at Johnny's mother for help; she was putting the medicine bottle back now.”

Okay, new theory. She is purposefully ignoring what is going on because she approves of it. This is the only thing that makes sense.

Ruby announces that she will take the baby to bed.

“'OK, love,' my father replied, his eyes not leaving mine.”

Amber tries to escape by asking to see the baby's room.

“'I don't think that's a good idea, Amber. Matt's not well. You can see his room another time,' my father interjected before Ruby could answer.”

No one can miss the creepy tone to his words. Ruby has to see how desperate Amber is to get away, and how pointedly her husband wants to be alone with her. No. It's just not possible.

This really is this dumb

At this point, DBD could have a twirly mustache and tie Amber to train tracks and Ruby probably wouldn't even notice. Seriously this whole chapter so far could be summed up like this

DBD

Step-Mom Ruby

Amber

And it get's better.

“I stepped to the side and almost ran out of the room after her. Just as I passed my father, he grabbed my wrist and yanked me to a stop, almost making me fall. I felt the scream trying to rip itself out of my throat, but I swallowed it back down. I couldn't show him how much power he had over me.”

This isn't a Giles Corey “more weight” moment you idiot! Help is in the house and by the Ligahoo's changing form, you refused to do the one thing that would make any sense. I cannot wrap my head around why she is suddenly this prideful. Ruby can't be far off, Johnny is upstairs, why not scream your bloody head off? Even if DBD is able to convince them that he was being harmless and not harassing his 16 year old daughter, there would be other people there. She would be, relatively, more safe.

“'You look beautiful, Amber. Just like your mother when she was your age. You always were a fucking peach.'”

This sentence made me read the DSM-V's entry on pedophilic disorder because it occurred to me that Amber is now a little too old for DBD's reprehensible and disgusting taste. And I was right. If he is a pedophile, which all evidence points to that direction, he would be attracted to the prepubescent Amber, not teenage Amber. The DSM-V does say that DBD could be attracted to adults as much as children though, so I guess he is just an all around sexual deviant.

“Luckily, my body's natural reaction had progressed in the last couple of years...”

WHEN? WHERE WAS I WHEN THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT HAPPENED? And what about the other five times you where assaulted? Was that when your “body's natural reaction had progressed'? Cause you went from cowering in fear most of the time, to kneeing that Mark guy in the balls and at no point in time were we shown how this change happened. Can I sue for a character giving me whiplash?

She knees him and runs up stairs. But don't worry, she thought this through, unlike every chick in a horror film ever.

“I came here in Johnny's car so I didn't want to just run out of the house with nowhere to go.”

Cause you don't have a brother and boyfriend with cars and phones to come get you.

No, instead she finds Johnny's room and walks in on him in a towel. I guess he decided to take a shower, I don't know, don't ask me. Amber hugs him because physical contact after your abuser tried to assault you again makes the most sense.

She tells Johnny that she needs to go home now. Johnny gets dressed while Amber closes her eyes and thinks about Liam. On the way out, Ruby stops them.

“'Are you sure you can't stay for dinner, Amber? Stephen would love to spend some time with you.'”

That's it! I'm convinced she knows.

They get to Amber's house. Liam and Jake are all “WTF? Why is Amber a mess?” I'm assuming Amber is mess. Naturally, we are not told any more than “you look pale” which could just mean she is a vampire.

Allow me to summarize the next 2 pages in 3 gifs

Amber and Liam

Jake

Johnny

Then Johnny, being an asshole for the first time, reminds Amber that she promised to explain why she was terrified of DBD instead of letting the “obviously” traumatized girl recover from the incident. Naturally, Amber thinks

“Jeez, this is going to be so damn hard!”

but, don't worry. If you think that this means we will get a glimpse into the damaged psyche of Amber as she finally says out loud what happened to her for several years instead of oppressing those feelings, you are wrong. We are wrong, and I am sad.

“~Liam~”

I hate everything.

“Amber curled herself up into a ball on my lap, pulling her knees up and tucking her face into the side of my neck.”

Amber must be tiny and Liam must be Andre the giant for this to work.

“I rocked her gently as I listened to Jake telling Johnny about the abuse when they were kids...”

YAY! Even more of a cop out. We don't even get to hear him tell the tale and see how it effects all the characters. We are just told that it does. Awesome.

“...how their father had tried to attack Amber, and how we'd kicked him out three years ago.”

Then Johnny berated them for not calling the cops and allowing a criminal to work his way into his own family....or not.

“He left out the sexual abuse that no one really knew very much about...”

Not even the audience.

Johnny is not surprised. Liam puts Amber to bed. When he comes back we find out what I knew would happen, DBD is beating Johnny and his mom.

“Three years ago I'd told Jake that we should call the police instead of just kicking him out, but he's insisted he didn't want Amber to go through that.”

Yeah, he would rather have Amber live in fear because her rapist, her tormentor, and her father is out free and could come back into her life at any time. Jake is the only reason there is any sort of plot, but because the “plot” is stupid I hate him.

Liam mentally calls Johnny

“...a good kid.”

Liam, he is a year younger than you and a year older than the girl you are currently having sex with. Word choice.

“As guys, we weren't really too good at support.”

Fuck you and your gender stereotypes.

“Angel would be perfect for this; she was so damn loving and kind.”

Since when? Are you just saying that because she is female? Because we have not been shown anything about Amber that makes her seem loving and kind.

“'Johnny, you need to tell your mom that he's done this before. It could be the push that she needs to leave him before he does anything to Matt'”

You mean, that thing I have been saying this whole time? It feels like she is mocking me by bringing up logic with about 50 pages left to the book.

Jake offers to house them if Ruby decides to leave DBD. Johnny says he'll talk to her about it. They agree not to tell Amber and only barely want to tell their mom (not Ruby). Jake, she may notice that three extra people are living at her house.

Johnny leaves, and Jake asks Liam to give him a reason not to commit murder.

“'Because then you'd be in jail, and Angel wouldn't have her big brother here to protect her'”

Or, just go with me on this, you could call the police! Maybe even the UK equivalent to Child Protective Services. You know, prevent him from hurting Amber or anyone else ever again.

Jake cries and the chapter ends with Liam comforting him.

Boy Window Chapter 18: A Whole Lot Of Ew

Last time in Boy Window... there was a battle of “wits” between Jessica and Amber, and we met the step-brother Johnny as played by Gerard Way.

Chapter 18

It's the next day, and Amber's mom is all “why you so happy.”

“I grinned and suppressed a giggle; I couldn't very well tell her that my hottie of a boyfriend had just given me an extremely good reason to be smiling before he climbed back out of my window.”

Jake and Amber talk about Jake's feelings for Kate. It is about as interesting as box mashed potatoes. Liam walks in and he is smiling like an idiot too. Liam says he missed her and this happens

“I heard my mom 'aww' quietly and I tried not to laugh. 'Oh you did, huh?' I said, slapping his hand as he moved it down between my legs under the counter.”

Liam can you not paw at your girlfriend in polite company. You seriously just got laid and her mom is 2 feet away.

More talk of Jake and Kate happens and we get fast-forwarded to school. The crowd of females is not at their car this morning, instead they are at Johnny's.

“'Wow, we really have some sluts at this school!' I whispered to Liam.”

I know, right? It sure is slutty of those girls to be attracted to Gerard – I mean Johnny – like that. What kind of self-respecting woman has feels for a man, let alone a hot man. I just wish they were all like Amber and Liam. They don't spend all of their time trying to have sex with someone.

Amber asks Liam to save Johnny. Liam says

“'Why must you be so damn nice all the time?'”

When has she ever been nice? Johnny is the only person she has been nice to in this entire book. Even her supposed best-friend Kate gets the slut shaming treatment.

Speaking of which, Kate shows up, says she isn't interested in Jake and Amber thinks this

“Jake loved the chase I could tell, he'd never wanted anyone he couldn't have before, and I honestly think he wanted Kate now just because she wasn't interested.”

So we are just reinforcing that Jake is shit. Good, I was scared there for a second that he might make sense.

Liam returns with Johnny. Johnny makes polite conversation while

“...Liam's hand pushed down the back of my jeans, squeezing my behind.”

See? This is what I'm talking about. All those gross whores trying to “talk” to Johnny were just uber sluts, they need to take a lesson in decorum from Liam. I mean, Amber only has to

“...elbow him in the ribs to stop him from feeling me up in the middle of the school hallway.”

They all decide to go to the hockey game on Friday with Kate making her intentions to Johnny known. It makes me want to reread Changeless by Gail Carriger because the BFF romantic subplot in that was more interesting. I mean, the phrase “the caboose of my love has derailed” was seriously used. It was delightful.

Anyway, that's enough about good books. Jessica walks up and chucks the envelope full of money at Amber.

“Holy crap! Did she just give me over four thousand dollars?”

Which makes me realize, if they are somewhere in the UK, why does she keep saying 'dollars'? My understanding, and correct me if I am wrong, is that dollars are not an accepted form of currency in the UK. Is this done just to confuse me?

Jessica says “don't lose it” all ominously, so Amber gets the brilliant idea to do this.

“I stepped up close to [Liam] as I shoved the money down the front of his jeans, pushing my whole hand down there too.”

“'Look after that for me, boyfriend. I'll get it out later,' I purred suggestively as I pulled him down to kiss me. I heard people cheer and clap, guys calling things like 'oh yeah' and 'nice'.”

“I lingered behind with Liam, not wanting to break the kiss. I can't believe I won four thousand dollars! What can I blow that on?”

If you have the faculties to think about the money while kissing your boyfriend you are probably not that into him. I tried to warn you Liam.

They share a laugh at Jessica's expense. I know I've mentioned this before, but I don't get why they hate Jessica. Yeah, she has called Amber “emo girl” and “bitch” but she didn't start with the bitches until after the bet was concluded. Until that point, Jessica really thought that Liam had a thing for her. Yeah, he wasn't making a move, but they did have sex a couple of times and Jessica is young enough to equate that to love. I kinda glossed over it, but in the last chapter, Jessica had a whole speech about how she thought that Liam and she belonged together. It was framed in a “villain's speech” way but to me it sounded more tragic and desperate than anything insidious. Jessica cared for Liam, and he used her for sex and now he is mocking her with the girl that Jessica sees as “the other woman”. More importantly, why do I have more sympathy for a bitchy side character than I do for my main duo?

Anyway...

Liam and Amber ponder how to spend the money. Liam denies any claim to it because

“'I already have everything I could ever want right here'”

They go to class and we learn that a tardy gets you detention but leaving campus without parental consent gets you nothing. Makes sense!

And now for a page break.

“The next month passed really quickly.”

Well, hell it must have if it happened during a page break.

We get an update on the Jake-Johnny-Kate love angle that no one cares about. Kate and Johnny have gone out a couple of times, and Jake does not have feelings for her, he just doesn't like not being the center of attention.

“So, to rectify the problem, he slept with a few extra girls and made himself feel a lot better.”

Remember when Amber was praising Jake's merits? Yeah, I don't know why either.

Johnny has reached BFF status with Amber. Amber goes to one of Johnny's skateboarding competitions, but wait, what's this? He could only get one pass which means that Liam can't go and Amber will be unattended for more than a minute? You know what that means. Sexual assault time!

“I gulped, feeling a little sick...”

Oh, is it because of the crowd? You said once that you didn't like crowds and that they made you anxious.

“...as I looked at the ramp. It was huge...”

Are you being serious Amber? You do know this is a skateboarding competition, right? And that may require him to use a large ramp, right? He is not playing with a techdeck on the stairs.

“The tricks that they were doing blew my mind – somersaults, handstands, everything that you would think of.”

Shoot, child. Johnny better have one hell of a routine if someone is doing a somersault with a skateboard on a 15 foot ramp with a steep incline. My knowledge of skateboarding only goes as far as the old Tony Hawk games, An Extremely Goofy movie, and Rocket Power, but even I know that.

Johnny goes up to take his turn, the whistle blows and

“Panic overcame me, so I squeezed my eyes shut, listening to the people clap and cheer, but I didn't want to see. I knew that the minute I opened my eyes, he'd fall and break his neck.”

...we don't get to see anything? At all? She sets it up for Johnny to blow our mind with his mad skills and we don't get to see it? What, could she not think of a way to top somersaults? Why does everything interesting happen when narration isn't? Is that our punishment for reading this book, cause it sure feels like it.

“Next time I'd have to tell him I couldn't come. I'd just wasted his spare ticket by not even watching it.”

So instead of supporting him and possibly being there for him if he does get injured, your going to stay at home and boink your boyfriend.

Amber tries to lie and say she saw but some how Johnny was able to do fantastical stunts and watch Amber at the same time so he doesn't believe her.

“He'd brought me here to watch and give him support and I couldn't even do that. Clearly I was a useless stepsister.”

Johnny wins third place and Amber hugs him cause she hates human contact. But don't worry, she will remember she has PTSD in a moment when Johnny asks to go home and change before the go out.

“Nausea rolled over me in waves. I couldn't go.”

See? I told you. It's okay though cause all she has to do is think of Liam and PTSD magicks itself away. Makes it easy!

Amber tells Johnny that she can't she her dad. He asks why but all she says is

“'I just don't, please.'”

This is another moment when she could have said anything and it would have worked. Johnny has to know that you guys don't have the best of relationships because in the 2 years that the dad has been in Johnny's life, he never met you until you started going to the same school. You could just say that he left on bad terms and that you aren't comfortable talking about it. It's not like the only explanation is “Sorry, I can't go to your house. You're step dad used rape me once a week and I just can't handle seeing him now.”

Johnny says that the parents and baby went out of town for the weekend and they aren't expected home until late.

“I studied him to make sure he wasn't lying or trying to trick me or something.”

What kind of shitty friends do you have that that is the first place you go?

Amber agrees to go and naturally Johnny asks if he will ever know why Jake and Amber hate their dad so much, but Amber says she doesn't want to talk about it. This bothers me because that is putting Johnny, his mom and baby Matt at risk by not talking about the abuse. Sure, they may not believe that the dad could get away with beating and abusing 3 people for 8 years, but it could also be a much needed warning sign. Amber is not obligated to say anything, but I don't know why she wouldn't want to protect someone she calls a best-friend.

They pull up to Johnny's house. It's ritzy. We find out that the dad is an investment broker of some kind. Amber distracts us with chat about Kate and Johnny smooching. Johnny goes to get changed and showered, and the second he leaves the dad walks in.

Amber tries to escape but is thwarted by a locked door. I think it is the one to the garage which is weird because the lock should be on the outside then and she still can't open it, but whatever, they meet. The dad gives her the pervy once over but the semi adequate description of

“He looked at me, his eyes raking over every part of my body while I just stood there unable to move, unable to breathe. I felt like I was a kid again. I was terrified, and this time I had no Jake to protect me. The man that ruined both our childhoods was standing less than fifteen feet from me.”

is not enough for me to get my hopes up anymore. Having one decent passage every 5 chapters won't cut it. I'm just glad that the chapter is over, and even more glad that there is only 6 more chapters and an epilogue left.