Boy Window Chapter 2: 8 Years Later

Last time in Boy Window. Amber (8) has a douche bag dad that has beaten and sexually assaulted her since she was five. Liam (10) sees her crying one night (cause they're neighbors) sneaks in to her room and they fall asleep snuggling.

Chapter 2

“~ 8 years later ~”

 

This book is not about an 8 year old rape victim falling in love!

“He was spooning me from behind...”

Well, yes that's how spooning works.

“...I could feel the usual 'morning glory' pushing against the small of my back.”

That is an unusually casual response coming from someone who was a victim of sexual assault for at least three years. I guess between chapter 1 and 2 DBD could have been arrested or killed and Amber could have been seeing a therapist to work through her problems. I'll give Moseley the benefit of the doubt.

Meanwhile...

Amber is all “get up”

And Liam is all “No.” glomp

And they sleep. I'm sure this had a point.

“'Amber, you had better already be up!'”

Ah, so the point was to cause conflict? Cause slightly over sleeping is the worst thing ever?

 ...and now you are all singing the song in your head. You're welcome.

Amber and Liam have a spat about over sleeping.

“He chuckled wickedly and dived for me, pushing me back down onto the bed and pinning my hands above my head as he rolled on top of me.”

...And then PTSD?

“'Pinned you to the bed? Were you dreaming about me again?'”

…...And then PTSD?

“His face was inches from mine and his blue eyes glittered with mischief.”

…......And then PTSD?

“I scoffed and clenched my hands into fists, not giving him the satisfaction of watching me attempt to fight him off. I wasn't in a playful mood today.”

….........And then PTSD?

“'Yeah, you wish!' I retorted sarcastically.”

Yeah, I do actually wish you had some reaction other than mild annoyance. This would be fine if she wasn't the victim of years of sexual and physical abuse, but since she is this whole interaction makes no sense. He is being an asshole for being sexually aggressive with someone he knows to have been assaulted, and she is responding like this is nothing when all of chapter one made it clear that she was frequently in this same position with her own douche bag of a father. She can be a strong independent woman but after at minimum THREE YEARS of abuse, she should have some reaction. It doesn't matter how comfortable you are with someone, there have been cases of were people have killed their loved ones while experiencing an episode.*

On that happy note, Liam finally gets out of bed so they can get ready for school.

“We rarely had anything pleasant to say to each other, so the silent treatment was nothing unusual.”

Why don't you have anything pleasant to say to each other? Why are you secret snuggle buddies if you do not have anything to say to each other? Where is this antagonism coming from? It's not because he is an asshole who does not respect the trauma you experienced, because then you would have had a stronger reaction before. So if it isn't that, then I don't get it. If they were just having sex, I would almost understand it more. Yeah, that's physically intimate, but you can have sex with someone you have no romantic feelings for. Cuddling is emotionally intimate. There is a level of trust you need to have when you are trusting another person with your unconscious body.

Moving on, Amber gets dressed and meets the Jake and Liam in the kitchen so they can go to school together.

“His brown hair was messy in his usual 'just got out of bed' look, which, to be honest, he did get out of bed and it looked just like that. All he ever did was run his hands through it a few times and add a bit of styling wax.”

I get it, he has that slightly disheveled look that makes all people interested in men swoon but that took forever to communicate. I suppose this is to illustrate how much she takes notice of him and to reinforce the “we are secret snuggle buddies” business, but it gets tiring.

Also, do people still use styling wax? That stuff sucks to get out.

Meanwhile...

She takes a few sentences to describe how Liam is the foxiest cat in town but it feels generic so I'm going to do a fancast...hm...wrong nationality (probably) but Heath Ledger from 10 Things I Hate About You.

Yeah you're a bad boy, so bad that I bet you'll respect my feelings. Naughty.

Liam baits Amber by eating “the only cereal I like” and saying

“'Running late this morning, Angel?'”

Because I guess he never got out of that “picking on the girl you like” phase. Either way, she steals his bowl of cereal and her brother asks if she's okay.

“Of course I look harassed, I had half an hour to get showered and dressed all because of Liam!”

I know there is that whole “girls take forever to get ready” thing but as a person of the female persuasion, 30 minutes is more than enough. Yeah it can take longer, especially if make up and complicated clothing is involved, but if she is just going to school then she is probably just wearing jeans and a shirt. I guess it may be a problem if she has long hair and likes to blow dry it, but so what? Leave the house with wet hair.

Actually, now that I think about it, what's the setting? Cause wet hair would suck in winter months if it gets too cold. Other than them being in middle class suburbia, we have no idea were they are. Vernacular and spelling leads me to believe they are somewhere in the UK, but we still don't know what time of the year it is except that school is in session. You know what? Benefit of the doubt. I'm only a dozen pages in (according to my Nook) so let's believe that Mosley will explain at some point in time.

Amber narrates that Jake does not know about her slumber parties.

“Jake was extremely protective of me, he always had been, but he had gotten worse since my dad left when I was thirteen.”

Hold the phone. Wait, DBD's gone? But I thought he was the antagonist. So what will the conflict be? Why was he here in the first place? Are his actions going to be the emotional barrier that keeps Amber and Liam apart?

“Well, left wasn't the right word. My brother and Liam had beaten the sorry excuse for a man to a pulp and thrown him out of the house when I was thirteen because they came home early and had caught my drunken father trying to force himself on me […] After they'd thrown him out of the house, and warned him not to come back...”

...they called the police? No? WTF? Yeah I'm all for beating a rapist and abuser but he assaulted her from age 5 to 13. That is 8 years of abuse! He should be arrested. If this guy were real, he wouldn't stop just because he was caught. He isn't fucking Swiper from Dora the Explorer.

Amber tells us that her mom is the personal assistant to a director of an electronics firm and is always out of town so her and Jake take care of each other.

“Liam was also extremely protective of me, but we still didn't get along – even though he had literally spent every single night wrapped around me in my bed for the last eight years […] he still teased me like crazy and annoyed the life out of me just as much as he did when we were kids, but I always knew he would be there for me if I needed him.”

Let's assume that Liam pouncing on her earlier was not a shitty thing for him to do. Let's pretend that that is an okay way of teasing a rape survivor (IT'S NOT). Then why is Amber thinking “Gee somehow I don't get along with this guy who is protective of me, who I cuddle with every night, who is my brother's best friend, who knows about my past trauma, and whom I trust completely.” That sounds a lot like getting along to me. So far, (shitty pouncing aside) his biggest crime has been eating her cereal and making her over sleep. Oh noes?

I get that she is supposed to “not realize” that he is in love with her, but the dude calls her “Angel”, I think he is showing his hand at this point. I mean, I don't get when people fancy me, but that is because I don't like me so I don't understand how anyone else could either. I get that they do, but I don't get why. Amber seems to have the opposite problem. She obviously sees that Liam likes her, but some how draws the conclusion that he doesn't.

“It was as if he had a split personality. By day he would annoy me, making me crazy and angry all the time, and by night he would be the sweetest boy in the world and would cuddle me, making me feel safe and secure.”

So far, we have not seen this dynamic, but maybe that is the conflict. Maybe he has to convince her that he is not crazy and loves her.

Liam then tells her she looks “hot” which she of course scoffs at because he is obviously teasing her.

“My brown hair was still damp […] I had added the bare minimum make up, as usual, just a little mascara to make my grey-green eyes stand out, and some clear lip gloss. My jeans and hoodie combo did not make me look hot in the slightest.”

So I was right on the wardrobe, and why is she pissed at him again? How does this outfit require more than 30 minutes to put together? Why is the narrative focusing on this? It's not like I buy that they may not get together in the end so why bother? Is it just to give Amber the chance to be mad?

I understand that this exchange is to illustrate that he thinks she is pretty and she doesn't, and I get that a self-deprecating character is an easy self-insert character but why would she think that he is teasing? He doesn't say anything else, even when she flips him off, so I don't think he is trying to manipulate her. I don't trust when people compliment me either, but I usually don't think they are trying to tease me. I usually assume they want/need something from me. Word choice is kinda important.

Mmmm...whatcha say...

They drive to school, and she is all “I'm so indie listening to my music in the backseat.” They arrive on campus and then something happens that would never happen at any actual high school.

“When we pulled in to the school parking lot, the car was immediately swamped by people, the same as every morning. Liam and Jake were considered 'hot players' at our school. They were seniors and every girl's dream […] it was sickening.”

1. In what universe does this happen to a non-famous teenager?
2. Why is she so bitter? It's inconvenient sure, but why does she care if her brother and his BF are popular?
3. How do they know when Liam and Jake get to school?

Are they here yet?

“Liam laughed as I cringed getting out of the car, trying to avoid the horde of skanks that banged into me because they were trying to throw themselves at him. One girl elbowed me on purpose. I looked at her in her tiny skirt that looked more like a belt and her top that showed her stomach and grimaced. Jeez, she is such a ho!”

Oh hi obligatory bitch cheerleader (OBC), I'm sure you have fleshed out character motivations.

Seriously though, why the slut shaming? Why the internalized misogyny? I'm going to assume that Moseley has the same problem that E L James has with blondes (ie I hate them because of reasons).

Meanwhile...

Amber and OBC (Jessica) have a “witty” repartee involving missing skirts and “the emo look doesn't work for you” (burn?). Then Amber explains that this is common for them because Jessica and Liam had sex and few times and she wants more. Then Amber follows up with

“For some reason she had never liked me.”

How un-self-aware can you be? I hate this trope in writing, but people do get jealous so I will let that slide, but how emotionally stupid does Amber have to be to not get that Liam digs her?

Or is this Moseley's attempt at foreshadowing?

Liam tells Amber she looks good and Jake smacks him with a “Dude, that's my little sister!” line which makes me wonder why he didn't do that earlier when Liam said she was good looking. But hey maybe, that's the conflict – getting Jake to accept their relationship?

Amber then greets her friends by name (like you do?) and we get this brilliant dialogue.

“Hey, Amber, did you ride in with hot piece of ass one and two again today?”

1. Ew, objectifying people.
2. Ew, that's her brother.
3. Why bother asking when she said that they drive to school together every day?

Amber slut shames her brother while her friend tells her that Jake and Liam are sexy.

“Jake was a great person, but he treated girls like objects...”

Then he is not a great person. Think that's harsh? Change up the sentence. “Jake was a great person, but he treated black people like objects.” See what I mean?

“...and Liam, well Liam was just an all-round jerk.”

Again, if we allow that in this fucked up world, his pinning her down against her will was “playful” then how is he exactly a jerk? Like if Amber was pissed about that, then I would completely agree with her. In fact, I would understand why she is so mad. But nope, he is evil because he gives her compliments, has no sexual expectations of her, but has sex himself.

“School was good, as usual...”

I only mention this because she has used variations of “usual” 16 times in 20 pages and it is kinda getting to me.

Amber talks about how she is popular cause of Jake and Liam and how they keep boys from going after her. This makes her happy because she doesn't want to date, it has nothing to do with 8 years of trauma, she just doesn't want to. Which is fine. Aro/ace is a good thing to be. After a hyper judgmental comment about girls interested in her guys, she talks about how smart she is.

“...although I wasn't a nerd.”

Well, fuck you too.

“'Oh yay, hot piece of ass number one is coming over!'”

Jesus Christ Super Star, who says this? That is your best friend's brother or his best friend. I will admit I had crushes on best friend older brothers but I never told my friends that. You want to know why, cause that aint cool bro! No, I just sat there awkwardly trying to have casual conversation about Linkin Park, Metalica, and General Hospital (which I did not watch).

The next page of dialogue can be summarized thusly

Liam: Hey, Angel.

Amber: Get your manwhore arm off of me.

Liam: I'm going to drive you home since Jake has a date.

Amber: Run along now, I'm sure you have some more STDs to spread around.

Liam: I know you'll want to sleep with me tonight.

Amber: because I'm so in love with you.

Liam: I love you, too. smooches on cheek

Amber: He is the devil and I hate him.

A lot of that was quotation. Okay, except that last sentence.

Later that day....

Amber and Liam are driving home, they stop at a convenience store. She gets pissed because he lifts her up. She stomps off to look at magazines.

"I was happily flicking through Teen Vogue when two boys walked over to me. I stiffened. 'Well hello there,' one of them purred."

Hi, contrived reason for Liam to save her.

The guys try talking to her, she says she's with her boyfriend. They call BS and ask to “get to know each other”

“I felt sick. Oh God, Liam, help me, please! Deep Down I knew I was pathetic but I just hated confrontation and I hated people touching me, especially people I didn't know.”

NOW PTSD!? What about all the times at school when you talked about people touching you? Did that not count? Sure you said “especially people I didn't know” but your trauma has not effected you at all, AT ALL, until now.

Anyway, Liam saves her.

 “Were you surprised? I was surprised.”

“He was always doing sweet things like buying me candy; it was just a shame he was such a man-whore jerk, otherwise he would probably be a nice guy.”

Is her only problem with him that he has sex? Cause that what it seems like to me. She is pissed that girls find him attractive, and she's pissed that he has had sex. Whatever, they get home and she starts making dinner.

“Liam hovered around the kitchen behind me, making me feel violated as he stared at my body.”

Violated? Really? Because if a rape survivor says they feel “violated” it usually comes with a more intense emotion than annoyance. Seriously, all she says is that “my eyes are up here!” and yes, he is being an ass. Yes, she has the right to feel uncomfortable with being objectified, but word choice! Violated is not a word that raped victims just bandy about willy nilly.

She yells at him for making her over sleep and assumes he is stay for dinner. As she turns to go do homework, he grabs her wrist to apologize but all I can think is “I hated people touching me”, but, alas, nothing. He says he is sorry. She says she was sorry she was a bitch. She monologues about how much she liked being so close to him and the last two pages are them watching a movie and going to bed with something that I think is supposed to be sexual tension or chemistry. Woo.

*I talked to a psychiatrist friend of mine and she explained that some people don't manifest symptoms until later in life. Like they will be fine and then drop a potato and remember their trauma. But Moseley makes it a point half way through this chapter to show that she does have PTSD symptoms, it's just selective. So idk what's going on.